Friday, January 7, 2011

Knee Update

I saw my knee doc on Wednesday. Here's the Good News: I haven't lost any flexibility since my last appointment. I still have 70 degrees of bend. Here's the Better News: he agreed to do the scar-removal surgery! I thought I was going to have to wait until summer, and I was going to try to force the issue at this visit, but I didn't have to. He brought it up himself. Yay! If I can get to and maintain 90° and get my extension down to 0, I'll be happy.

I'm also going to try to get admitted to in-patient rehab for at least a week or two. Now that we know I'm a 'scar-tissue-former' (it's called athrofibrosis) we need to attack this aggressively. Yuck.

Tuesday, August 10, 2010

I know, so it's been almost a year since I've posted anything! I'm going to try to do better! (Even though only 1 person reads this blog, and she already knows pretty much everything before I post it).

Ok, to catch you up:

I had Total Knee Replacement on my right knee on December 3. My very sweet friends Bernie and Duane, and then Jim and Donna let me stay in their homes to recuperate for the first three weeks since I couldn't drive, and I didn't want to be stuck out in BFE (which is where I live) with no transpo.

So, I've been in Physical Therapy ever since, and just got "fired" for not continuing to make progress. I got to 4 degress on extension, but can't get past 90 degrees on flexion. I had to have my knee manipulated under anesthesia in February because scar tissue was preventing me from being able to bend. I went back to the dr two weeks ago to see if he could do another manipulation but he says it's too late. There is too much scar tissue and it is like concrete and could literally break my femur. Yikes! He wants to wait until December (to allow my knee to fully heal; it's still swollen) and then go in sugically to remove the scar tissue. I also have a calcium deposit growing in my quadricep.

On the brighter side, I took a "staycation" the week before last and spent each day with a different friend. It was so much fun! And this weekend, I went tubing on the Guadalupe with some folks from my Singles group at church. What a blast! Cold water, hot Texas sun; perfect combination.

Monday, September 7, 2009

I have been working with a group called Check it out; it's awesome!

Monday, July 13, 2009

Friends are Cool!

I have the most amazing friends! I just celebrated my 50th birthday with a HUGE party full of dear friends and family. It was not exactly a surprise, but the details were kept hidden. (Great job Donna & Dede!) I had no clue who would be there. (How did you even know I knew some of those people??) I even had to ask what time to show up at my own party! :)

Needless to say, I had a blast, and one of the best parts was co-celebrating with my friend Ralph.

I have approached each birthday since my husband died with trepidation, but my friends have made each one not only "survivable", but really, really fun. I love you all!

Friday, April 10, 2009

A Stone Heart

I have a cold, stone heart. Really. My husband gave it to me.

We had been married three years. I didn’t think the three-year anniversary gift was supposed to be concrete, yet there it was. Staring up from the bottom of a beautifully-wrapped, frilly box was a grey, cold square. Underneath was a grey, cold curved shape. As I removed the heavy pieces from the box, it began to emerge and to make sense.

“Oh!” I said. “It’s a heart.” The disappointment in my voice was probably palpable. I hated hearts. Always had. As the girl most likely to never snag a date, ever, I had crossed hearts off my list long, long ago. If I hated hearts, I could never be disappointed by never receiving one.

And then I met the man who was to become my husband. As far from the “movie star” some girls of dreamed of marrying, my guy was ordinary. So ordinary, he was downright adorable. A little thinning on top, a devilish twinkle in the eye, a sly grin that just barely gave away his wicked sense of humor. He saw in me the girl I had so successfully hidden from everyone else. He saw the hurt, the reticence, the fear, the aching and longing. He felt it himself.

His first marriage was unloving, un-affectionate and un-physical. In a very sad turn of events, after years of “therapy”, it was finally revealed that his wife had endured years of sexual abuse at the hand of her father. What was even sadder was that the “therapist” advised that the wife’s aversion to sex and physicality was not only understandable, but quite alright.

Years of living separate lives, except when it involved their children, led to divorce once the kids went off to college.

My heart broke for Michael when I learned of his story. How awful to be married 25 years and never once get a love-note from your wife. How devastating it must have been to go to sleep every night, back-to-back, without so much as a goodnight kiss.

Michael actually knew of my “heart phobia”. I had told him while we were dating that I hated everything most people think of as romantic. In addition to hearts, I hated love songs, I hated pink, and I hated roses. Are you thinking now that it’s kind of hard to please me? Oh yeah. But this magician I fell in love with wooed me with “Stand By Me”, the very stark version recorded by John Lennon. He bought me the black clothes that I love, and NEVER got my size wrong! He brought home tulips (which I had never actually told him were my favorite flower).

And so when he presented me with this very unusual, stark, grey concrete heart I fell in love with him all over again.

Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Five Random Things About Me

1. I became a widow at age 46.
2. I have no toenails on the first two toes of each foot.
3. I prefer salty snacks over sweet.
4. It is my dream to retire on the beach, say, in Ecuador.
5. I love God.